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I dropped my leg so I was sitting cross-legged in the couch and leaned into him. “Honey, you remember everything so I don’t have to remind you I haven’t seen you in nine years. I dig it that we reconnected and I love having you back.” I again threw an arm out, this time toward him and back to me. “This is great. You and me spending time together, shooting the breeze. I missed that. And I get it that friends make gestures, but this is too much.”

His eyes warmed during this speech and he took his arms from the couch, bent his legs, leaned into them, and me, and put his elbows to his knees, never releasing my eyes.

“Baby, I want you warm and liquid. The first bein’ physically, the second bein’ financially. You stop payin’ so much for heat, you’ll have more money for the rest of the shit you gotta do.”

This made sense.

But he’d again called me “baby.”

And I needed to address that.

So I asked, “What is that?”

His head cocked and his eyebrows drew together. “What’s what?”

I drew in breath and on the exhale, stated, “You calling me baby.” Then I went on quickly, “Not that I don’t like it. It’s sweet. It’s just not…” I hesitated, “us.”

Something happened to his eyes, his face, his whole big body and that something made me brace at the same time it made my heartbeat escalate.

“You know what it is,” he said softly.

I didn’t.

“I don’t,” I shared.

His eyes stayed locked to mine and I knew him relatively well, or I used to. But even if we hadn’t been separated for years, I still would not have been forewarned to the fact he was about to blow my mind.

“Before, we had Elsbeth between us. My head was fucked about that, about her, and it took almost a decade to get it unfucked. Lookin’ back, havin’ you back, I now know and I reckon you know, that’s the way it was. She was between us. She knew it too. And she didn’t like it. But it didn’t matter. My head was fucked so I couldn’t see clear of her and not doin’ that, I didn’t see you.”

I knew my lips had parted. I also knew my eyes got big. And last, I had no clue what to say.

So I said nothing.

“Now she isn’t between us,” he finished.

It was then I knew what the “baby” business was.

I just had no idea how to react to it because I never considered it. He was beautiful. He was kind. He was smart. He was funny and interesting and affectionate.

But he was my best friend’s boyfriend.

That didn’t mean my mind didn’t go there in vague ways, not stupid enough to wish for something I could never have, just silently covetous of what Elsbeth had. And, because of all that he was and that Elsbeth had it, in the end, infuriated she threw it away. Angry enough to end an important friendship because of it.

Sitting there, all that was Jacob, and all that being spectacular sitting across from me, holding my eyes, I finally understood that the reason I was angry at my friend was because, in throwing Jacob away, she took him away from me.

And now I had him back, but also, he was saying I’d always had him a different way, we just didn’t go there and he was going to take us there.

Yes. I had no clue what to say but my body had a clue how to feel. Warm and there were a lot more tingles.

“Jacob—” I started on a whisper.

But he interrupted again.

“You saw me, asked me out to dinner that same night, no fuckin’ around. Since then, you’ve called twice for no reason except to connect, and, baby, before you freak that I noticed that and what it said, I’ll tell you, I’m fuckin’ glad you did and I’m also fuckin’ glad about what it said. The boyfriend you were on the fence about, you got off the fence in less than twenty-four hours after seein’ me again and decided to get shot of his ass. And you didn’t waste any time gettin’ me right where I am tonight. That is not friends reconnecting. You know it. So do I.”

“I—”

“Don’t deny it.”

I shut my mouth.

"You think you lost beauty, Jacob, but you didn't...just turn the dial."

Jacob "Deck" Decker and Emmanuelle Holmes used to be friends. She was the best friend of his ex, Elsbeth. But once it ended, they lost contact as well. Nine years later, they cross paths again.

Emme has changed significantly on the outside. But Deck is betting on the fact that she has not changed much on the inside. This is important especially since he is not part of a task force trying to investigate her current boyfriend for robberies and she is on their radar as well. 

Deck is protective, determined, bossy, sweet, and sexy. He knows what he wants and does not take "no" for an answer. He knows right away he is going to keep Emme safe and wants her for his own. He knows who she is deep down and has great fondness for her from the past, in addition to being attracted to the updated version of Emme. He realizes how shallow he was when younger that he did not see everything she was in the past.

Thank you, Forever (Grand Central Publishing) & NetGalley, for providing me with an ARC of Kaleidoscope in exchange for my honest opinion. Quotes are from arc copy and subject to change. 

Jacob Decker (Deck) and Emmanuelle Holmes (Emme) haven’t seen each other in nine years, since Deck broke up with Emme’s best friend. But their reconnecting couldn’t come at a worse time. Emme is dating someone else. As Chace’s best friend (Breathe), he is brought in on a case the Gnaw Bone police force is working on. He and Emme quickly fall back into the easy friendship they had 9 years previously. When Emme gets twisted up in his case, Deck will do anything to protect her and make her his.

Emme seemed like such a level headed character with everything figured out, at least that's what I thought at first. She runs the lumber yard owned by her father, is renovating her dilapidated mansion, and for the most part keeps to herself outside of work. As the story progressed, it became clear that something was holding her back from true happiness. 

I think I fell in love with Jacob Decker within the first chapter. He made appearances in at least one other book in the series, but for some reason I missed how sweet he could be. But now that we get to know him on a deeper level? *sigh* His devotion to Emme began even before he realized that’s what it was, and that bond only grew stronger for him. I loved watching him rediscover Emme and their friendship, and was so frustrated every time he had to coax her out of running away from him. And I love that only Emme is allowed to call him Jacob. That he started that years ago and didn’t realize the significance of it -- loved it. 

I loved what the kaleidoscope meant to Emme and Jacob. Each time in the story it was referenced I found myself melting. From what it meant nine years before the book begins, to the scenes about it during, and even in to the epilogue, it is such a sweet memento.

Deck and Emme’s story was a perfect addition to the Colorado Mountain series. It was not as intense, as far as kidnappings/shootings/live burials from some of the others in the series, but there was plenty of suspense and traumatic events to work through and a good read.

Kaleidoscope wasn't a bad story, nevertheless, it wasn't her best nor my favorite. 

Thank you, Forever (Grand Central Publishing) & NetGalley, for providing me with an ARC of Kaleidoscope in exchange for my honest opinion.

Kristen Ashley

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