But the reappearance of a boy from her past sparks a change in her. Flynn is an awkward man with Asperger's Autism that she and her friends knew in High School and called "Freaky Flynn". He has now returned to their small town. Ellie's feelings about Flynn are all confused and tied up in guilt, shame, anger, and loss. There is a big mystery of an event between Flynn and Ellie six years ago that changed their lives. I had to keep reading to find out.

I had cared about Flynn. So much. It had scared me. I was terrified to feel anything for anyone. I had spent much of my life shutting everyone ut. I hadn't a defense against a quiet boy who was just as lost as I was . I had opened up. I had let him in. And then I had pushed him away in the only way I could. By destroying him. 

In the present, their interactions were sometimes stilted, confusing, awkward and brimming with underlying emotion. You could feel this connection somehow between these two unlikely people. 

Flynn grabbed my heart with his honesty, and simple, straight forward thinking. He was so genuine and open. He had a big heart and capacity for love and forgiveness. He just wanted friends and to be cared about. He lived in his own little world but he was happy there despite the hardships he had been through. His behavior and limitations were not sugarcoated, but were addressed in a respectful way. 

He is good. He is kind. He cares for others deeply and absolutely. He is talented. He is shy. He is smart in ways I can only dream of. He loves with all of his heart.

Ellie was often rude, angry, conflicted, and confrontational. She had a tough outer shell, but she really just wanted to be loved and accepted. But she was so afraid of rejection and being judged. At times she was weak and bowed down to peer pressure and reverted to bad habits. She hid behind anger, guilt, and shame. They always had the potential to bring out the best and worst in each other. Ellie always felt for him, but was not always strong enough to stand up for him. And Flynn always liked Ellie but often got hurt by her hot and cold behavior. 

As adults, his reappearance sets her onto a different path and out of her rut. He makes her feel, makes her see the good in herself, and makes her want to be a better person. And she pushes Flynn to his capacity to grow as well, but has empathy for him and understanding of his deficits. And as they began to explore a relationship together it is tenuous, complicated, and sweet. They both seem so innocent in their physical connections...him because he is and her because the feelings are so new for her. 

Because Flynn Hendrick had taught me how to feel. He had taught me how to live. He had taught me how to love. 

This story was not pretty. It was rough, heartbreaking and painful for much of it . But it was also beautiful, sweet, and poignant at times. Flynn was an unlikely hero, but I could not but love him and admire him. My heart broke for him so many times, but he had a resilience about him and such a real honest way of seeing the world. And even though there were so many times I wanted to shake Ellie, she also had the capacity to understand Flynn like no one else. I could tell that underneath all of her hard edges she had a good heart under there but was confused and frightened. This was also about her finding her inner strength and changing her life in more positive ways and breaking free of those that brought her down. Ellie and Flynn were really soul mates that had definite issues with timing, but were destined to be there when the time was right. 

We were a perfect, messed up pair, Flynn and I. We always had been.

This is an untraditional love story of two very different  people who broke each other with painful words and actions, but also were able to put each other back together again.  These were two people desperately searching for a connection and making one in far from ideal circumstances. But their lives were full of challenges and complications and nothing for them was easy. Maybe that is what made their good times so special. 

This book was unique, emotional, powerful and had a good message of the importance of trust, acceptance, empathy, respect, and understanding. It was told in Ellie's point of view in present and Flynn's point of view in the past. I felt it was especially important to see into Flynn's thoughts since his communication and expression was more limited. It really made you see the almost child like quality to his thinking while also seeing how strongly he felt. I would have liked to see his thoughts in the present as well. 

I enjoyed the sweet times with Ellie and Flynn. I was very frustrated with all of the drama with her selfish, out of control, immature friends Dania, Stu, Shane and Reggie. I wish we had seen less of them and more good times with Flynn. I felt like the ending was a bit rushed and I would have loved to see more from the epilogue. But overall I was left with that feeling of reading something totally different and special, even though I was uncomfortable or angry during a lot of it.