Blog Tour & Giveaway: Taint: S.L. Jennings
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Right now, you’re probably asking yourself two things:
Who am I?
And, what the hell are you doing here?
Let’s start with the most obvious question, shall we?
You’re here, ladies, because you can’t f*ck.
Oh, stop it. Don’t cringe. No one under the age of 80 clutches their pearls.
You might as well get used to it, because for the next six weeks, you’re going to hear that word a lot. And you’re going to say it a lot.
Go ahead, try it out on your tongue.
Ok, good. Now where were we?
If you enrolled yourself in this program then you are wholly aware that you’re a lousy lay. Good for you. Admitting it is half the battle.
For those of you that have been sent here by your husband or significant other, dry your tears and get over it. You’ve been given a gift, ladies. The gift of mind-blowing, wall-climbing, multiple-orgasm-inducing sex. You have the opportunity to f*ck like a porn star. And I guarantee, you will when I’m done with you.
And who am I?
Well, for the next six weeks, I will be your lover, your teacher, your best friend, and your worst enemy. Your every-f*cking-thing. I’m the one who is going to save your relationship and your sex life.
I am Justice Drake.
And I turn housewives into whores.
“Stepford wives. Trophies. High-class, well-bred prostitutes.
They seem perfect in every way. Beautiful, intelligent, graceful. The perfect accessory for the man who has it all.
Except one thing.
They are as dull as lukewarm dishwater once you get them on their perfectly postured backs.
I am Justice Drake.
And I turn housewives into whores."
Holy F*ck, HELLO Mr. Drake!!! When and where can this housewife sign up?!?
First, I would like to thank Angie from Angie's Dreamy Reads for strongly recommending I take the chance on this new to me author. So, I am going to pass on the torch and STRONGLY RECOMMEND that you one click this bad boy immediately!! If it helps, this book is sitting on my all-time favorites of 2014.
Lately, all I seem to do is open a book read a paragraph or two and close it, moving on to the next. With Taint, there was no opening and closing or moving on. Justice Drake did not just break my wicked long book funk; he tore it to shreds. Taint, Justice, and S.L. Jennings are in a league of their own. Such a unique story and hero! I found it refreshing to read a book that was not bogged down by the typical story line, drama and angst. S.L. Jennings knows exactly how to write a dominant, cocky male with perfectly placed romance, drama, and satire.
“There is always one in every class. One that doesn't want to accept the ugly truth staring at her in the face. Even though she’s read the manual, signed the contracts, and undergone all the necessary briefings before arriving, she still can’t grasp her reality—flashing bright, neon arrows toward her dried up vagina. Good thing I have no qualms about reminding her."
I am giggling because the above quote is where I thought to myself; let the fun and games begin. Right about here is where I would normally break it down for you. Sorry, I am not even going to try. Taint is one of those books that no matter the review I give it, I will never do it justice. I am simply not eloquent enough to describe Justice Drake using the proper descriptions he deserves, damn, who am I kidding—there is nothing even remotely proper about Drake. Nevertheless, I am still not going to get descriptive. Therefore, we will leave it at that, and you will just have to trust me enough to venture into the unknown and enjoy the wild ride I like to refer to as Justice Drake. You will not be disappointed, promise!
"You suck at sex... You don’t satisfy your husband sexually, which is why he wants to cheat on you, if he hasn't already. You may be a fantastic wife, mother, homemaker, whatever, but you are a lousy lover. And that trumps all.
And I am here to help you.
I’m going to teach you how to fuck your husband.”
I am a bit upset with myself as I have had this author’s books on my Kindle for a while now, collecting them as I go with the intent to read. Why in the world did I ever delay?! If I could kick myself, you had better believe I would. S.L. Jennings, you are a goddess! I am so totally in love with this author’s writing—wicked hard-core girl crushing right now. If you have not experienced this author as of yet then I suggest starting with Taint. I for one will quickly be moving on to Fear of Falling.
Thank you, S.L. Jennings for the opportunity to read a complimentary copy of Taint in exchange for my honest opinion.
Most known for her starring role in a popular sitcom as a child, S.L. Jennings went on to earn her law degree from Harvard at the young age of 16. While studying for the bar exam and recording her debut hit album, she also won the Nobel Prize for her groundbreaking invention of calorie-free wine. When she isn’t conquering the seas in her yacht or flying her Gulfstream, she likes to spin elaborate webs of lies and has even documented a few of these said falsehoods.
Some of S.L.’s devious lies:
FEAR OF FALLING
THE DARK LIGHT SERIES
- Dark Light
- The Dark Prince
- Nikolai (a Dark Light novella)
- Light Shadows- coming in 2014
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