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Expected September 8, 2015
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“Professional athletes are pillars of their respective communities. They are heroes in the eyes of boys and girls and are expected to conduct themselves in a manner that positively represents their community.”

The public loves a good scandal. Seeing someone fall from the pinnacle of success makes a great headline. No one knows that better than I do. What started out as a promising career in college football, spiraled into scandal and shame.

But being a hero is easier said then done. Especially when there are those who expected to see the great Brody Madden fail. I craved nothing except being the best—willing to do anything to prove them wrong. But I went too far, and I tried too hard, and it broke me.

“At the time of going to print, Jordan Elliott was unavailable for comment.”

I met Brody Madden in my senior year of college. An Australian native on an international scholarship, I was the female soccer sensation with stars in her eyes and no room for a hotshot wide receiver with a chip on his shoulder.

But a heart bursting with ambition and a driving fire to succeed isn’t made of stone. I became his strength, his obsession, and the greatest love of his life. Only I wasn’t there when he needed me most.

This is a story about love and a game that takes everything. Where the path to glory is paved with sacrifice. Where pressure makes you, or breaks you, and triumph is born in the ashes of failure. Where two people’s end game will change everything.

Brody Madden is not what he seems. To many, he is the handsome, popular, rich, football God who has it all. Few know of his internal struggles and demons.  His perfect facade hides a vulnerable, broken young man full of self loathing, anger and disappointment. All he really wants is acceptance from those that matter and to feel worthy. Football is all he thinks he can succeed in. But he is at risk of losing that as well. 

Jordan is sassy, fierce, ambitious and sweet. She has her own past issues that she tries to push out of her mind. She has so much on her plate, but does not want to let anyone down. Soccer has always been her life's dream and she is determined to succeed.

Trying to keep their arrangement private requires some skillful maneuvering and it has repercussions on both of their lives.  I loved their banter, push and pull, surprising connection, and protectiveness of one another. They never meant to get attached or to care. They didn't have room for each other in their lives. Neither could afford to give up the head space the other took up because they were only supposed to focus on their game, goals, and being the best. They both have their internal motivators that lead them to excel in their sport and they are under intense pressure to succeed. But in spending time together, a new sense of need, connection, and feelings of belonging begin to develop. But eventually something will have to be sacrificed because their futures do not have common denominators and it seems impossible that they could have it all.

Brody is always having to fight--his demons, his feelings of worthlessness, for acceptance, to win and succeed, and for Jordan. She believes in him and strives to help him gain confidence. But with issues piling up, sometimes the fight becomes too much. And Jordan also finds herself fighting-- For Brody, for happiness, for love, to reach her goals, and to make everyone proud.  He usually has the ability to ground her, bring her laughter and little room to breathe. But he also has the ability to distract her and cause her pain. They both have so much pressure on them from so many places, but much of it they also place on themselves. And their need to protect each other just adds more. 

This is more than a typical NA sports story. It doesn't just scratch the surface and throw insta-love, lots of sex, and a quick HEA on top of a sports theme. This is an intricately woven and beautifully written story about raw pain, hope, healing, passion, and sacrifice. It is an epic journey of two people trying to achieve their dreams, but also trying to grab on to the person that believes in them enough to encourage them. But sometimes there are conflicts and challenges that seem impossible to overcome and some dreams supersede others. It is a battle for strength, acceptance, love, and happiness. It is about finding out what is most important in life to feel whole and about figuring out how to believe in yourself. 

I will admit that this book is long. And I have a low tolerance for long books these days. I was a beta reader for this and even warned the author of this ahead of time. I was fully prepared to get bored to tell her to take out unneeded scenes. But surprisingly I was not bored. I found myself totally engrossed. I hated to have to put it down and tend to real life needs. It was not full of long-winded descriptions or details I did not care about. Every word, every interaction, every feeling, every heartbreak, and every victory was valid and important. In the end, I felt it was all needed and I remained entranced and in breathless anticipation throughout this epic journey. And it was truly epic and poignant.

It had humor, heartbreak, sacrifice, hope, and redemption, and centered around a real, soul-deep, passionate love not only for each other but also for their sports. It had me going through so many emotions from laughing, crying, anger, sadness, frustration, and gripping my kindle due to tension. I loved these complex characters despite their flaws, failures, or unpopular decisions. I loved getting into both of their heads in dual points of view. I rooted for them all along and my heart broke with them during difficult times and celebrated the happy ones. I was broken so many times, then put back together, only to be hit with another blow. There were twists and surprises and so many ups and downs. And I felt it all right along with them.

I loved the side characters:  Jax, Leah, Hayden, Eddie, Carter, Paige, Nicky, Annabelle, and even their Professor.  They added layers of support, protection, and love for this couple and were not afraid to call them out as well.  I would love to see a book about his funny, sweet cousin, Jax, or her protective, sacrificing twin brother, Nicky. And of course there were a few antagonists that I truly hated that caused drama and dissension. 

I was not sure how Kate McCarthy was going to be able to follow up Fighting Redemption as it was our number one fave read of 2013, and Give Me Grace that was in our top faves of 2014. But she is an amazing author and has managed to write another moving, powerful story with characters that feel real and totally captured my heart. This is definitely one of my very top favorite reads of 2015. It is heart wrenching, passionate, dramatic, and inspirational. It had me completely captivated and emotionally invested throughout. I am left still thinking about these characters and their tumultuous journey and feeling the after effects of an emotional reading experience. These are the kinds of books that stick with me and inspire my love of reading. 

Jordan dreams of playing professional soccer. The chance to play for a top US college sends her out of her native Australia and on a course to play professionally, if she can finish her senior year strong and make the cut at the pro level.

Brody has NFL dreams and lives up the life of big man on campus as one of his school’s star players.

This is not a whirlwind romance that spans a few months from meeting to marriage. No. This is a story that spans a good part of the lives of the main characters. It is long. But it is written in such a way that there is always something going on; there is always movement to the storyline.

There is also a great message throughout the book. The characters struggle with self-confidence in a unique way. For someone who spends so much time being applauded, and seems to have it all, Brody has a hard time believing he deserves what he has, believing he can accomplish his goals, believing he can follow through. I ached reading the struggles he faced.

Jordan has an immense inner strength. Moving overseas and remaining focused on her studies and career goals, she didn’t expect how Brody would change her. But she knew what she wanted, even as she struggled with how to adjust her plans to include the man she had fallen in love with, or if she should continue on as planned after college. 

This story is far more than football and soccer, but I love how the sports push and pull the characters and exist as that initial bridge between them. But I also love the other traits that are exposed as commonalities and connections.

There were a few times the timeline and events threw me for a loop. The way it unfolds, key scenes are told in hindsight rather than as they happened and that shift made the resulting twists even more unexpected. 

This book kept me enthralled through it’s entirety. The range of emotions I felt as Jordan and Brody met, completed college and faced their future should not have surprised me as much as it did. Kate McCarthy never fails to entertain me with her stories and challenge me with her characters and this was no exception. But I was surprised to find that range within what looked like a regular sports novel.

I was gifted a copy in exchange for an honest review.